Dear Almighty Heavenly Father, I beg you to help me remain calm when I see commas — commas that you created, Father, by implication if not by direct hand — misused in such profoundly incorrect of a fashion as I am seeing on this here man-made site called Facebook. And Lord, you would think such a site with ‘book’ in its name would have an algorithm that would correct such egregious comma usage just like it identifies fake news so well, but no, dear Father. It. Does. Not.

Father, I am doing all in my power to remain as ladylike as possible in my commentary, but when one sees sentences such as these (pictured to your left), then you know, my dear Daddy, that I am calling upon my higher power to help me refrain from a snarky comment that will only divide when a healing is called for.

However, Father, you have just reminded me — the power of prayer is real! — that your very own Son came not to bring peace but to put a sword on this earth so, frankly, not only would would I not be wrong in chasing these wild commas off of the most powerful communication portal in the world or chiding them from running from their proper duty, it would be work of such righteousness you would not hesitate to approve. Therefore, my precious Father, let me change my prayer to be more in line with your divine will. [Father, you may scroll down just bit to see the revised prayer from your Comma Justice Warrior.]

Let me ask for your guidance, Father, in hunting down and exterminating these curly ques of deception and deceit.

O! Father, give me the wisdom to identify improper usage whenever and wherever it should occur.

O! Father, give me the courage to speak up when I see it.

Yes, Father, this is an Editor’s Prayer and I pray it in the name of your Son. Amen.